Escalation
by 3laxx
Summary: One dumb action by Adrien, one boiling of anger Alya, one passed out Marinette and one laughing-his-ass-off Nino. That should be hilarious. NoMagic!AU tho :D Slight Adrienette, hinting to more ;)


This certainly was not how Marinette had pictured her crushes and her first kiss. She had her eyes squinted and her hands were pressed against his chest while his hands were cupping her cheeks.

The bluenette already felt the heat welling up in her throat, fighting its way to her face.

In a matter of seconds, she was beet red.

Adrien finally pulled away, searching the faces around them for one other blonde.

The whole class was crowded around them but Adrien had only eyes for one.

And it was not even the girl he had kissed just now. On the schoolyard. In public. Out of a stupid comment.

"Shut up already, Chloé.", was the only thing he said.

Chloé just huffed and stalked away, snipping with her fingers to demand Sabrina's presence with her. Marinette's legs shook violently and she couldn't even open her eyes because she was way too shocked.

She felt that Adrien turned to her again, heard most of her classmates losing interest and scattering away.

"Are you okay, Marinette? Those were some harsh words Chloé had said to you…"

Yeah, right. Like _'you're not worthy'_. Or _'Adrien deserves way better, like me'_. Or _'Back off, he's mine'_. _'You're just a mere baker's daughter'_. Like that.

And then he had kissed her. He had just gone up behind her, had shot the blonde brat an accusing look, had said something like _'You don't know that'_ and then he had just pulled the clueless girl close and had kissed her.

Slowly, Marinette opened her eyes just a slit, glancing up at the worried boy.

"Marinette, you okay? Marinette?"

Tears formed in her eyes and the next she knew she was out of Adrien's arms and brown hair was in front of her.

"How _dare_ you?!", Alya hissed, digging her index finger into his chest, "How _the fuck_ dare you, Agreste! You can't just go on and kiss Marinette _just. Like. That_! What the _fuck_ , mister?! Who do you think you are! Do you even have the slightest idea of _WHAT'S AWAITING ME NOW_?! Holy frikkin' shit how can someone be so insensitive…?!"

Adrien sounded irritated, Nino suddenly standing behind him.

"Wh-Wha-…?"

" _UGH_ , I don't _believe it_! How can someone be _so OBLIVIOUS_?! You _broke her_ , man! I've gotta perform CPR now and I _don't have the tiniest bit of knowledge about that_! Man, how can you just let me alone with her _like that_! Great, another day of school _wasted_! Boys! So _annoyingly_ oblivious and dense, holy _shit_! C'mon Mari. Let's get you back to the living, girl."

The blonde model's chin fell and he felt Nino's hand on his shoulder. The girls left, well, Alya practically dragged Marinette across the schoolyard to the stairs, and he turned to his best friend.

"What did I-…"

"Bro, you messed up.", Nino said unsettlingly calm, gesturing to the young reporter who now entirely carried her obviously passed out best friend. Marinette really had fainted, hanging limply from Alya's arms, "Gonna help Alya carry Marinette. Just stay here and-… Don't do anymore stupid things, child. Counting on ya!"

Adrien shook his head, obviously not getting what they were all talking about. What had he done that messed with Marinette that bad and that had set off Alya's anger that easily? What were they all talking about?!

"But what did I do?!", he shouted after Nino. To his bad luck, Alya stopped dead in tracks, still carrying Marinette's upper body while his best friend had taken her legs. She said something to him and the boy hurried to carry Marinette up the stairs alone. The brunette turned, her face red because of boiling anger.

 _Oh holy shit_ , Adrien thought, _I am doomed. She's gonna rip me apart._

" _What_ did you just say, Agreste?! Go on, say it again! I wanna hear what left _your stupid mouth_!", she stomped up to him and once again, her finger was placed on his chest, but this time moving up to poke him into his chin.

"I-… I said-… I asked what everyone Is freaking out about-…"

"OH MY FUCKING GOD, HOLY FUCKING SHIT ADRIEN AGRESTE, WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM?!"

He stepped back, holding his hands up.

"Wha-…"

" _HOW_ can you be so _FUCKING DENSE_?! _HOW_ , seriously, _HOW_ can a human being with the full capability of seeing without glasses be so _FUCKING BLIND_?! Marinette likes you, liked you for a _FUCKING ETERNITY_ now and you haven't even _noticed_ her in that way and _TODAY_ you're just so deciding 'hey, she's being picked on again, I am a pretty blonde model and I am oblivious to the world, what can I do, _MAYBE FRIKKIN' KISS HER_ , HUH?!' Yeah, that's a perfectly fine explanation of what was going on in your head, you _idiot_! You broke her, you _FUCKING broke_ my best friend and I am left to pick up the _TINY PIECES OF HER HEART_ because she as well as I know very well that _sadly_ , she has _no chances with you_ because you don't even _consider_ on _LOOKING AT HER GOD FREAKING DAMNIT_!"

He was dumbfounded. Speech- and resistless he watched as Alya punched his arm, again and again and again.

"I-…"

" _DON'T_ you even _TRY_ and charm your way out of this! Your _stupid_ pretty face and _stupid_ model body and you stupid, _stupid_ boy who my best friend fell for _hopelessly_! _DO YOU EVEN KNOW_ , how hard it'll be from now on?! You _goddamn idiot_ , you _freaking_ smallminded, _oblivious little piece_ of the smelliest _shi_ -…"

"Hold on, Alya!", he grabbed her arms and held her still in front of him, trying to not be intimidated by her angry stare and red face from all the yelling, "Marinette… Marinette, the cute girl sitting behind me, she-… She _likes_ me?"

"Yeah, _of course_ man! You are just too _oblivious_ and _dumb_ and your _stupid pretty face_ was probably in the way of seeing that such a wonderful person like Marinette fell for you and I'm just being protective and I'm trying to protect her from any emotional harm because _you were dense_ once again and you just _go on_ and _shatter all my efforts_ in _just one. Single. Damn. Stupid. Action. Today_!"

A dreamy smile stole itself on Adrien's lips although Alya's punches really started to hurt by now.

"She-… She likes me? As in-…"

"SHE'S IN LOVE, YOU STUPID _FUCK_! YES!", he started to laugh and Alya momentarily stopped mangling his arm, "What're you laughing at, Agreste?!"

He took Alya's arms once again, swirling in a circle with her and jumping up and down.

"She likes me!"

"D-Does that mean you-…"

He rubbed the back of his head and laughed sheepishly.

"For quite some time now, yeah…"

The brunette in front of him tensed. Slowly, her shoulders went up and her face became even redder than before. He could almost see the smoke rising from her hair.

"Say what?!", she said, alarmingly quiet.

"I may suggest running.", Kim whispered into his ear. Considering Alya's state that was probably the best option.

* * *

As Marinette awoke again, she heard Nino's laughter. She rubbed her forehead, sitting up.

"What-…"

After a few moments of remembering what had happened and understanding where she was, she got up and went to accompany Nino by the railing. He was looking down.  
"What's up?", she asked, still pressing a hand to her head.

The boy couldn't even answer because he was laughing that hard. She glanced down at the schoolyard and saw the most terrifying but also kinda the funniest scene playing down there, something she wouldn't forget in a lifetime.

Her best friend was chasing around a madly laughing model. Alya was boiling of anger and yelling all kinds of insults and threats while Adrien was falling flat on his face because he was laughing so hard, picking himself up to not be murdered.

 _What was happening…?_


End file.
